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Signs

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All too often we look for the very very large signs, and ignore the small ones. Our son, Mark, died unexpectedly from fentanyl poisoning on June 1st 2019. We mourn his loss, and have seen the grief and devastation his death has caused us, his parents, his sisters and brothers, the entire family, friends, first responders, and the entire community.  One of the questions we have asked ourselves, perhaps too many times, is what warning signs should we have seen to tell us when Mark had returned to using drugs like heroin or another opioid. All too often we look for the very very large signs :   the telltale packet which has fallen on the floor, or a hypodermic or constriction band carelessly disposed of in the garbage, sleeplessness, a change in hygiene, the "I'm too tired" excuse, "I'm going to see a friend" or "get something to eat" or "I need to take care of something" which turns into a four or five...
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When You Discover Someone in Your Family Has a Substance Abuse Disorder

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Leigh and I lost our son, Mark, June 1, 2019. He was thirty five years old. He had lived with a substance abuse disorder for eighteen (18) years of his life. We lived every minute of this disease with him. So, you discover someone you love has a substance abuse disorder. We are working on changing the language about this disease for ourselves as well. The term 'addiction' may still be applicable to those with a substance abuse disorder, but in our opinion, the term 'addict' is not. This word has so much negative connotation, and stigma, attached to it. This word dehumanizes the person who is sick. We do not make up words for those sick with cancer, do we? Or someone with the flu, do we call them a 'flu-ict'? Of course not, the person is NOT the disease. We love them. So you discover someone you love has a substance abuse disorder. First of all - denial . That cannot be true! Not our son, daughter, cousin, nephew, niece, aunt, uncle, mother, father, frien...
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